You reap what you sow
Murder, terrorism, bombings, stabbings, mass shootings, racism, anger, hate, fraud, lies, scandal, economic woes, national debt, migrant ‘crisis’ and more. These are some of the headlines that we regularly see in our newspapers; always focussed on the worst and most negative parts of what goes on in our world. To be fair, they do run the odd ‘feel good’ story, but it is rarely, if ever, in the headlines.
If our only view the world was through the eyes of the news media we could be forgiven for thinking that it was an awful and dangerous world in which no-one could be trusted. However, most of our everyday experience tells us something different. Even when I was working with drug addicts and homeless people in Leamington I found that the vast majority of people were basically good. They may have been very broken, selfish, distrusting, vulnerable and hurting, but most of them were not intrinsically bad. Don’t get me wrong, I have encountered some people who are, for want of a better word, ‘evil’, but they have been a small minority. Yet this small minority are the people whose actions we often see reported in the headlines.
The negative diet we are fed is not just in our news media; our entertainment too is often full of negative interactions between the people in the films/dramas/soaps we watch on TV and at the cinema.
Psychologists have proved something we all know by experience, that negative comments or news affect us more than positive. Studies have shown that if someone close to us says something negative, then we need to hear at least five positives to counter it and ‘break even’. A good illustration of this is to look at EastEnders. Psychologists rated every interaction between people over a few episodes of EastEnders and graded them positive, negative or neutral. Most people would view that programme as being overwhelmingly negative, but the result they found was actually one positive to every negative. However, because we need more positive than negative inputs for it to seem neutral, the impression we are left with is that it is a negative programme. By contrast a similar study on the Simpsons showed it has about ten positives to every negative… which is why I prefer watching that programme!
A long time ago I heard a speaker at a conference ask, ‘If you have large drum of white paint and pour some black paint into it so that it turns grey, how much white paint do you need to add for the paint in the drum to become white again?’ The negative impact of other people’s comments, of what we see on the news, of what we watch on the TV is that ‘black paint’ is always being added into our lives.
The trouble with the constant bombardment of negative views is that it shapes how we see and act in the world. We suspect ulterior motives in other people’s words and actions and wonder how they might misconstrue ours. Even when we see an opportunity where we can be ‘good news’ for someone else we hesitate, because we don’t know how it will be received. Just earlier today I was in a retail park and I helped an elderly lady lift her shopping from her trolley into the boot of her car, but I hesitated before offering. Not because I didn’t want to help, but because I wasn’t sure how threatened she might feel if some random bloke asked if she would like a hand.
Our world view can become shaped by what we choose to feed our minds, or to put it another way… we reap what we sow.
So if we are to find balance/peace we need to counter the constant negative input with some positives. We need to build each other up and encourage each other, we need to remind ourselves of the positive relationships we have, of the people who care for us. We need to recognise be grateful for the good things and good people that are blessings in our lives; to recognise and receive the ‘white paint’ that they bring. Or as St Paul put it:
Finally, beloved, whatever is true, whatever is honourable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is pleasing, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence and if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things. Keep on doing the things that you have learned and received and heard and seen in me, and the God of peace will be with you. (Philippians 4:8-9)
Our harvest celebrations at this time of year are about counting our blessings and giving thanks for them. Reminding ourselves that despite what we may see or experience there is still a lot of good in this world and that we can choose to add to that through our own words and actions. I hope you can join us.
Rev Barry Jackson