Chapter 4 - Thomas
…I knew he saw all my bravado, all my fears, all my doubts and anger, all my guilt and shame… He saw all this, but there was no judgement in his eyes…
Metanoia – seeing things differently
John 20:19-29
19 On the evening of that first day of the week, when the disciples were together, with the doors locked for fear of the Jewish leaders, Jesus came and stood among them and said, ‘Peace be with you!’ 20 After he said this, he showed them his hands and side. The disciples were overjoyed when they saw the Lord.
21 Again Jesus said, ‘Peace be with you! As the Father has sent me, I am sending you.’ 22 And with that he breathed on them and said, ‘Receive the Holy Spirit. 23 If you forgive anyone’s sins, their sins are forgiven; if you do not forgive them, they are not forgiven.’
24 Now Thomas (also known as Didymus), one of the Twelve, was not with the disciples when Jesus came. 25 So the other disciples told him, ‘We have seen the Lord!’
But he said to them, ‘Unless I see the nail marks in his hands and put my finger where the nails were, and put my hand into his side, I will not believe.’
26 A week later his disciples were in the house again, and Thomas was with them. Though the doors were locked, Jesus came and stood among them and said, ‘Peace be with you!’ 27 Then he said to Thomas, ‘Put your finger here; see my hands. Reach out your hand and put it into my side. Stop doubting and believe.’
28 Thomas said to him, ‘My Lord and my God!’
29 Then Jesus told him, ‘Because you have seen me, you have believed; blessed are those who have not seen and yet have believed.’
All scripture quotations taken from
The Holy Bible, New International Version® NIV®
Copyright © 1973 1978 1984 2011 by Biblica, Inc. TM
Used by permission. All rights reserved worldwide.
Background:
We don’t read much about Thomas in the gospels. He makes three brief appearances in John’s Gospel:
The first is in John 11:16 – Jesus has just told the disciples that they are heading back to Bethany (in Judea) in order to raise Lazarus from the dead. The disciples protest because a short while before that, when they were in Judea, the Jewish authorities had tried to stone him. Jesus says they are going anyway and Thomas, ‘Let us also go that we may die with him.’ This seems to reveal a rather fatalistic side of Thomas’ character, and I don’t know why, but always imagine him saying this with a dour Yorkshire accent.
The second is just a few chapters later in John 14:5 – Jesus has just washed their feet and he talks about going to prepare a place for them and says that they know the way to the place where they are going. Thomas responds, ‘Lord, we don’t know where you are going, so how can we know the way?’ Which could sound almost sarcastic.
And the third time Thomas appears is in this passage, John 20:24-29, after Jesus has been raised from the dead.
We don’t hear about Thomas in the book of Acts, which is mainly concerned about the westward expansion of the Gospel. But the early church records that Thomas took the Gospel to Parthia (part of modern-day Iran). He is also said to have taken the Gospel to India, where after founding many churches, he was martyred. Today there are still many churches in India that are dedicated to Mar Thomas (St Thomas).
Thomas is often known as ‘Doubting Thomas’ because he initially doubted the other disciples’ experience of meeting with the risen Jesus. But the other apostles doubted of Mary’s account until they had personally met the risen Jesus, so Thomas just wants to see the same evidence for himself.
One question that isn’t answered in the passage, is where Thomas on was that first evening. We only know that he wasn’t hiding behind a locked door with the rest of the apostles.
What was Thomas like? Was he fatalistic or sarcastic? Possibly, but I don’t really think so. He was one of the Twelve; they would have been hanging onto the words of Jesus from the beginning, they would have witnessed the miracles he performed. Thomas, along with the others, would have performed miracles himself. I imagine he would have been in awe of Jesus and just as puzzled and confused as the rest of them as to why things weren’t going as they expected in Jerusalem. When he asks that question in John 14, I hear it as someone who is genuinely confused, but is courageous and open enough to say that he doesn’t get it and that he wants to understand… ‘Lord, we don’t know where you are going, so how can we know the way?’ (John 14:5)
I see Thomas as someone who is committed to being with and following Jesus, and who is a deep, reflective thinker with a strong desire to understand.
Before reading on, I suggest you pause and ask God to speak to you through this reflection, read the passage from John’s Gospel again, and then imagine that you have Thomas sitting with you, sharing his story, witnessing to what happened on that day.
As before, when you read through the Bible passage and the story:
Take time to notice how you feel about what you are reading.
Are there things in the story that jar, or resonate with you?
Are there things that surprise you, or that you disagree with?
Why is that?If you were Thomas, how confused/frustrated/angry would you feel when everyone around you is convinced of something that you find impossible?
And the end of the story, before moving on to the thoughts and questions for reflection, pause and ask God what he might be wanting you to take from this story.
If you find it helpful, make notes in a journal as you read and pray.
Click here, or on the button below, to read Thomas’ story